Sad, frustrated, and mad.

I've wanted to cry ever since this morning but I only got to let it out now.

I hate Lach with compassion. Ever since he got to Bali, he rarely messages me. He wouldn't viber me if I wouldn't viber him first. It's just so fucking frustrating! I understand that he's with family and that they are busy being out and enjoying Bali. But can't he find just a minute to message me? I just hate being ignored especially by him. Being on a holiday doesn't give you the fucking right to ignore me. You can't tell me "Please be considerate" etc etc. I am trying to be considerate but can't you call me at least once a day? The distance between us is already killing me, don't make the communication difficult, too because I might go crazy. I messaged him earlier this morning if he could at least call me because I miss him so bad and I don't feel alright. He messaged me after a few hours and said that they will head out again soon. It was alright for me, I understand. Two hours later, he posted a picture of him in a pool. That means he's already in the villa for a good forty-five minutes now (because the post says it was posted 45 minutes ago) but he didn't even bother messaging or calling me given that he has knowledge of my loneliness.  I was so hurt. It feels like he's purposely ignoring me. Am I part of those things he left behind in Australia? Is he trying to enjoy the peace thinking that he doesn't have to deal with me that much? What I'm feeling right now is a mixture of sadness and anger.

Times like this when he's giving me the chance to have second thoughts whether he's the right one for me or not. Maybe I'm also mad at the conclusion that he's not thinking of me as much as I am thinking of him.